keepsthefire | IC Contact

[ oh ... well, she didn't think this would start so soon. but it's Rin. she can't help but smile. ]

i'm really okay

i know you weren't in control of yourself, so i'm not mad or anything

can we talk more about this at home??

[He's really worried okay]

oh

yeah

yeah of course

i'll be here

[ she knows. :< and she's worried about him, too. ]

actually i've kind of proven i have no sense of direction in this place

if i describe where i'm at right now do you think you could come find me?

[ this would give them time to talk without everyone else around, too. ]

[Poor babies :c]

i think so

i was near a lab or something ... thats where i found mary

i haven't wandered too far away from it since giving mary over to her friends

mary?

i have an idea where that is. can you find the road?

yeah she's a really sweet girl

um ...

[ She looks around and spots a road ... way over there. ]

i think i see it

oh

ok ill be there soon

okay i will wait on the road for you

[ And so she heads over there and waits. ]

[And he hops on his bike and heads in that direction.

Hopefully she'll be standing out there so he won't miss her.]

[ Yep, still standing here. Still waiting. ]

[That made it easier to find her then.

He slows to a stop in front of her, a little out of breath because he totally didn't just pedal like hell to get there.]

... hey.

[ She sees him and smiles brightly. ]

Hey.

[ Immediately, she steps forward and gives him a hug. Does it hurt? A little, but she's really happy to see him safe right now. ]

[erf. Hug what why--

Rin pulls away almost instantly, not because he doesn't want the hug but because he can see how injured she is.]

Your arms... Jesus fuck, Kohaku--... I'm sorry.

[ She obtains a sheepish look. ]

I-It's not that bad, really ...

[ It is kind of bad. She just doesn't want him to feel worse. ]

I still did it, though! H-how can you be okay with that-- with me after that?!

[ Please don't yell at her? Please don't, she doesn't like it when you yell. ]

You were sick, Rin ... Whatever was in the water made you lose control of yourself. I can't rightfully blame you for something I know you wouldn't have done if you had a choice in the matter ...

[He's yelling because he's upset with himself. He can't even fully sound angry just... really sad and really hurt and really <>scared that he's done something that horrible to a friend.]

Okay, yeah, it was the water this time, but-- I can't always control it, Kohaku! I can't-- what if next time you don't get away fast enough?!

[ She falls quiet for several moments. ]

... The only reason I ran away to begin with was because I had gotten sick from the water, too. It made me afraid of everything.

[ She looks up at him seriously. ]

If not for that, I wouldn't have run from you, even like that. If there's a chance I could do something to help you, I would take it.

[ She's put her life on the line to help people dear to her before. She would do it again. ]

B... but...

[No, no no she can't say things like that! Not when it involves him being the reason she winds up hurt or even dying!

He stares back, completely stunned and almost in to silence save for the noises he makes until he can find proper words again.]

Th... that's stupid!

[Spot on, Rin. Good show. ~~You Tried Star~~]

What's so stupid about giving your all to help someone you care about?!

[ Whoops, now she's yelling too. ]

Sure, maybe I'd be safer if I didn't, but it really wouldn't sit well with me if I didn't at least try to do something to help!

[ Aaaand she might be glaring a bit, too. ]

Don't lie, I know you would do the same thing if it were the other way around. Not just for me, but for anyone you really cared about.

Y... you--

[Okay now he's actually getting angry. Mostly because he doesn't see why they both need to be self-sacrificing idiots. Considering how things went with Saya the day before, too, this is just him reaching his limit with everything in this goddamn place.

His hands go up and he lets out an annoyed, frustrated, angered noise that very nearly slides in to a growl before they fall to his sides again.]

I would but at least I know I could walk away from it! I don't wanna watch anyone die and I don't wanna kill anyone least of all you!

Don't throw your life away for some one like me, Kohaku!

Someone like you? Do you realize just how important you are to some people? Do you realize just how much you're loved?!

You might not think you're important enough for someone to risk their lives to help, but there are definitely people who think of you as being important in their lives, okay?!

[ She really hadn't wanted for this to turn into an argument, but ... well, now she's too angry to think any way else. ]

[Yeah that's kinda what happens when you get angry. Irrational thoughts and words and all that.]

But I'm not! I'm the one who fucks everything up, the one who can't save anyone--! Friends don't hurt each other and I've already done that t-to you and Armin and even Saya!

I'm not some one anyone should care about cause bein' around me just ends badly for everyone eventually! I-I don't get how the fuck you can look at your arms not be so fuckin' pissed at me for what I did to you, infected water or not!

Yeah, well, guess what? I'm not pissed about that. What I am pissed about is that you're here trying to tell me how I should feel!

[ She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. Must calm down ... must calm down ... ]

Look, no relationship is going to be absolutely perfect all of the time. Mistakes are going to be made. This world is also all kinds of insane, and will put us through hells that we can't even imagine most of the time. I can't speak for Armin or Saya, or anyone else ... but I know you wouldn't ever want to hurt me, or any of your friends. It just happened. There's no point in dwelling on it and what could have happened, because we've got bigger things to worry about. And if we have any hope of succeeding over those bigger things, we can't be doing that.

[ She looks pretty emotionally and physically exhausted at this point. ]

I don't want to argue with you anymore, Rin ... I didn't want to argue with you to begin with.

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